Hello and welcome, Bolt users!

Four things to say about this week: [IQ] [Education] [Shirt]. This all makes me miss our dear departed brother Bill Hicks even more. But to keep me sated, I found this mega-archive of unreleased BH stuff. You can really just replace one Bush with another in your mind.

In less (de)pressing news, my bud Lil Jon created a parodysalute to Russell Simmons’ Vote Or Die campaign (I mean seriously, is Paris Hilton in a shirt really going to sway anyone to vote? I mean other than voting her off the island of Manhattan, Survivor-stylee) called Crunk Or Die, hosted by my “friends” at my old gig, TVT Records.

Oh and in case you aint hurr, theres a new definition for Rock And Roll, and this creepy asian guy is it! Seriously, he’s got more skills than any 4 bands that play at rothko (Hi, Alex!)

In formerly-hot-people-falling apart news, we have the unfortunate inevitable beginnings of the sag of Joey Potter. Why oh why must people grow old!

Oh also, check out one-hit-wonder-but-actually-pretty-cool band Local H (who’s main claim to fame was getting the word ‘copacetic’ into a mainstream rock song)’s cover of Britney’s “Toxic” which proves once and for all that no matter whether your life is in the gutter and your body is falling apart and you’re giving blow jobs to your fiancee on your balcony, a good pop song is a good pop song.

And in case you haven’t seen it, here’s the Episode III trailer, which actually looks like it might not suck. (AOHell membership required). Of course its not as cool as the Grandaddy video which is like Polyphonic Spree on LSD, which is saying quite a bit. [thanks, fashionablylate!

Apropos of nothing, I’d like to close with a little anecdote. When I was working at TVT, my friend Tom and I used to share an office. We also both had Barry Manilow’s classic “Copa Cabana” on our respective computers. Come Fridays, we’d both be sitting hard at work or whatever and then with no warning one of us would start playing the song at maximum volume. And thats when we’d know that no more work was getting done.

Her name was Lola…she was a showgirl.

Woo. A whole bunch of randomness today.

First off, although I’m not in love with John Kerry, Duhbya has to be the worst public speaker in history. My grandma coulda done better, and she’s dead. Hey George, maybe you should look words like ’sovereignty’ up before using them, in case some reporter catches you on it and you end up sounding like an idiot. Well, at least it wasn’t a series of SNAFUs caught on tape and posted on the internet to be mocked for all eternity. Aaaand that’s all for politics, folks.

As Britney descends into total swamp trashdom, it appears she’s decided to get rid of her place just down the block from my old employers. Here’s some pics of the fancy pad she’s giving up. [Via curbed.com]

From the NSFW-but-not-quite-gratuitous-porn department, we have what must surely be a photoshoot from an upcoming Apple ad campaign. Perhaps she could use some of these iEverything-inspired butt plugs in her next one, just to really drive the point home. Hi mom!

In new music news, I’d like to echo allmusic.com’s sentiment regarding the new Dana Owens a.k.a. Queen Latifah record, in that the worst thing about it is it makes you sad that this is her first record where she sings all the way through. A versatile talent, this woman is. Except for the abomination that Taxi looks like. What were you thinking, Jimmy..What were you thinking.

If you’re a music journalist enlisted to review the new Interpol (I’m not a huge fan but people seem to like them), there’s a helpful article of 101 things to compare them to other than Joy Division. Get it? Cause people said they sounded like Joy Division before. And even though they do, people are sick of hearing that comparison. So, funny. heh.

From the “It’s 1 in the morning and I dont want to think of any other clever From The Desk Of lines” department, three random bits of information before I go enjoy my new stereo. The should-be-up-in-the-porn-paragraph-but-really-not-porn service Rasterbator will take jpgs and … well .. rasterize ‘em so you can print ‘em out real big. But really I just liked the name.

Distributor of all that is cool in the electronica world K7 has decided to put “Not Copy Protected” labels on all of their CDs. Kinda speaks for itself that they have this.

and we have this:

Okay so maybe it was only two things.

G’nite gracie.